• H. M. L. Swann

Day 8: Performance



300 Days of Writing

Day 8: Performance

Dear Hollywood,

My name is Lilly Louisa Smith and I’m writing to tell you I’m ready to be on the big screen.

My boyfriend, Gerald, well, he don’t think this is such a good idea, writing to Hollywood and all, but I told him, “I won’t know unless I try!”


He hit me mighty good for that. He don’t much like sass.


But that’s alright, Hollywood. See the only reason I am telling you any of this, my troubles that is, it ain’t for sympathy. Don’t be getting the wrong idea. I don’t need no teary-eyed hugs, no cards, no. I’m telling you this on account of its part of my resume.

You see, being with Gerald isn’t easy. He’s got money and comfort, but he’s real mean and drinks like the devil. But he’s smart too. He wouldn’t let me live here in his big ole house for nothing. He wants to believe he’s loved.


You see, I’m the best actress you’ll find because I’ve been acting my whole life, and my most important role to date has been being Gerald’s woman for the last two years.


To convince him, I have to act real meek like when he hits me. In truth, I’m boiling inside. I hate him. I hate the smell of him. Dirty sweat and motor oil masked behind heavy amounts of manly aftershave that don’t help much at all. He smells like piss and Bud Light in the evenings, late late, and that’s when I really need to act the part because he repulses me but I make him believe I want him.


I am a dedicated worker, Hollywood, as long as I’m compensated. You see, I’d like to get into the business of acting in movies rather than in life. I figure I can still get paid, but then I can buy my own house. With my own pool. I’ll be able to mix drinks for me, myself and I, and I won’t have to go to bed with a heavy-set fella with a one-track mind unless I’m in the mood.


Hollywood, I mentioned earlier that I’ve been acting all my life, and that’s true. See I was raised with a mama and a papa, but my papa wasn’t really my papa if you see what I mean. I always knew it, don’t know how, I’m just that sharp. When mama confirmed it for me, she told me never to tell, and Lord knows I never did. Not till the day he died two years ago; God rest his soul.


In conclusion, Hollywood, I would be the best actress you could hire. I’ve been acting these last 22 years, and I don’t intend to stop. Not until I have it all.


And mark my words… I will.


Yours sincerely,

Lilly Louisa Smith xox



Сайхан Бичээрэй!


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